Identifying as LGBTQ+ in Men's Football: A Toxic Environment

“You shouldn't exist” ... “Why are you here?” ... “Don't take another breath.”

Since revealing he was gay in 2021, player the athlete has faced constant threats and hateful comments on online platforms.

“When I first saw these messages, I was devastated,” the player explains. “Nobody should have to endure such words.

“I'm trying to get better as a player and be the best I can be on the pitch, and then get put down because of who I am. It's appalling.”

Player Cavallo was at Adelaide United back in 2020 when he became the only openly gay elite soccer player in the world.

This summer he left Australia to join non-league Peterborough Sports, who play in front of crowds of about 400 in National League North, one level below of the English soccer system.

The 25-year-old combines playing for the Cambridgeshire part-timers by speaking up on LGBTQ+ issues and leveraging his platform - he has more than one million followers on social media - to champion equality and inclusion.

“Absolutely, we've got mountains to do,” the footballer says when asked if football still has a problem with discrimination.

“I don't go more than a week without hearing about an issue.”

‘People want to harm me’

Several years passed for Cavallo to work up the courage to say “I'm gay” before coming out on October 27th, 2021.

“My only desire is play football and be treated equally,” he stated in an accompanying video.

The player was twenty-one and building his reputation at his Australian club in Australia's top flight when, backed by his colleagues, he announced his orientation publicly.

“The future was uncertain. I had no expectations,” he recalls. “It felt like the right time in my life. I needed to move forward.”

His emotional coming out video, titled ‘His Personal Story’, went viral on social media.

“My mobile phone exploded with encouraging words. It was overwhelming.”

A prominent club were among numerous famous teams around the world to show solidarity with Cavallo, with the coach at the time the German manager saying: “I appreciate that he did it because it sparks conversation.”

Barcelona defender the athlete also expressed backing, posting online that “soccer culture is lagging behind and your actions drive progress”, while his former club issued a statement backing their “remarkable” and “brave” player.

Others, however, were not so accepting.

Cavallo soon turned into a target of homophobic abuse by rival supporters.

During early 2022 a competing team were fined A$5,000 over discriminatory chants from fans aimed toward the player during a game.

“The comments I encountered were painful and disparaging towards LGBTQ people,” he says.

“I remained calm because I knew that would only feed the haters.”

There was a frightening incident at a petrol station in Australia, where the athlete was physically attacked by an individual who identified him from the coverage.

“It was terrifying,” he recalls. “I remember thinking ‘this is real - individuals intend to hurt me’.

“Should this be tolerated? Definitely not. But through my disclosure, this is what it brings.

“My wish is that future individuals who comes out while competing in soccer at a high level doesn't have to experience the journey I have endured.”

The player says the constant menacing messages and hostile communications have affected his mental health.

“It's disappointing because I am having to explain why I belong on the soccer pitch for my identity,” he states.

“We don't sit straight people down and ask ‘why should you exist in football?’.

“Many individuals see me as a smiling, optimistic person. But there are days when I lean on my fiance, his name, and he witnesses much of what occurs privately.”

‘Premier League player coming out would move mountains’

Cavallo's decision to reveal his sexuality helped prompt teenage Blackpool forward Jake Daniels to announce he was gay as the Britain's sole publicly out active male professional footballer in May 2022.

However, there are zero publicly LGBTQ athletes in the top English division.

“It would move mountains,” says the footballer on the impact a elite athlete revealing their orientation would have.

“But I'm not going to sugar-coat it. There are a lot of scary things that would await this individual. Within soccer culture, being an openly gay player is a highly hostile environment.”

Over two decades after a pioneering player - the UK's initial out soccer professional - died by suicide in 1998, the current athlete has spoken about the “toxic masculinity” that still exists in men's football.

“Simply attend to a match and observe the hostile environment and masculinity that the crowd brings,” he says.

“There is still a lot of work to ensure there is a safe space in football for individuals like me and Jake.

“We haven't seen it (more players coming out) as much as we would like.

“My role is to continue advocating for principles I believe in, and strive for eliminating the toxic masculinity in football changing rooms and creating a safe space.”

‘My mission is to drive progress’

Cavallo says soccer has enabled discussions within team environments about revealing one's orientation.

Yet, he is disapproving toward Fifa, after Qatar, where homosexual partnerships are illegal, staged the global tournament in 2022.

Future World Cup is scheduled in Saudi Arabia, where homosexuality is similarly prohibited.

“Am I impressed that the World Cup is in countries that ban gay unions, where people like me will be put in prison for just existing on that land? It's frightening,” states Cavallo.

“I get messages [from residents of such nations] saying ‘I face imprisonment for my identity - can you help me?’.

“It's devastating that people are getting locked up for being who they are.

“Certain nations that are significant soccer markets and they reject LGBTQ+ people. Those are the countries that often focus on me.”

Nevertheless, Cavallo says he won't cease advocating.

“Soccer has enabled dialogue in the changing room. It has allowed me to speak and educate people who want to learn more.

“Not everyone is going to like you for who you are. But I've discovered support. I've connected with similar people.

“My purpose is to drive progress. That's my objective.”